Tools That Will Last Them a Lifetime
The teenage years are tough for the teens as well as their parents, who are struggling to balance how to allow teens to make their own decisions while maintaining their level of authority over children. During the transition to adulthood, teens will need to learn valuable lessons that they can use throughout their lives. In this post, I’ll provide a brief overview of how to help your teenager into adulting.
Communicate
Communication is important in every component of life, especially as you guide your child through their teen years. Be open and honest with your teen, providing examples from your own life to illustrate why you are encouraging them to move in a certain direction. Work to understand one another, and be open to their advice as well. Remind yourself what it was like to be a teenager yourself.
Clear and open communication is something that they will carry with them into the workplace as well as into their relationships with others. Help them think through the major decisions they’ll face by providing questions that will prompt them to give serious thought to their choices. Go over possible solutions and the consequences of each solution, and guide them toward making choices that will set them up for success.
Set an Example
When a teen is out of control emotionally, it can be very difficult for a parent to remain in control of their own emotions, but it is extremely important to do so. Lead by example by being responsible yourself. If you want them to learn good time management, model it. Be respectful in your interactions with your teen, even if they are disrespectful to you. Be firm, consistent, and calm in those situations. Express your desire to help them grow. When you make a mistake (or lose control emotionally) apologize to them sincerely and ask for forgiveness.
Don’t Rescue Them
If you do things for your teen that they can feasibly do for themselves, stop. They’re going to need to know how to pack their own lunches, iron their clothes, and get through the door to work soon. Along that line, allow them to suffer consequences. If they forget something, don’t rush to fix it for them. If they haven’t done their laundry, don’t do it for them. When they reach adulthood they won’t have you there to swoop in and save the day for them.
Guiding Teens is Important
Equipping your teenager to be able to handle adulthood is one of the best investments you can make as a parent. Set a good example for them by being willing to admit when you are wrong and ask forgiveness. Don’t rescue them when they’ve messed up on something like forgetting their track shoes at home, and above all – communicate respectfully with them. Other tips to think about are organizational/executive skills, time management, meal prep, and budgeting. Would you like more resources on how to lead your teenager down the path to adulthood? Check out our blog for more information. I’ve also written a helpful book geared toward teens and young adults to help with this transition process: How to Leave Your Parent’s Home and Live on Your Own. As always, contact me if you have any questions!
