Everyone should have a mental health care plan in place to help them get through the tough, stressful things about humanity. As a teenager or young adult, how you handle stress will have repercussions for you. The best way to deal with stress is to actively manage it. Here are my tips on how to manage the stress of living on your own, along with some wellness tips and mental health resources. Read on to learn how to take care of your mental health!
Stress Management Tips for Living Alone
Making the transition from living with your parents to adulthood is tough. Paying bills, doing your income taxes, and finding work can be very stressful. If you live alone or with roommates, there are several tips to make life easier for you.
Building Your Stress Management Skills
Whether you are managing stress or fighting depression, it’s helpful to develop rational thinking skills. When you have a thought, take it captive and don’t allow it to penetrate your mind. Reframe negative thoughts. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, instead of thinking, “I’ll never get this done,” think, “Where can I start?” Even if it takes longer than you expect, continual progress will reward you.
Don’t self-medicate with drugs and alcohol. Using these substances will only lead to bigger problems in your life. Substance abuse undermines your self-control in all areas of life and may lead to more mental health issues down the road. Do yourself a favor and avoid it. (If you are struggling with substance, there is hope. Call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration to connect with someone who can help.)
Talk to people when you need help. Sometimes simply talking to someone can make a world of difference. Start with some of the free and low-cost ways to get help, but if that’s not enough, don’t be afraid to invest some money in professional counseling/therapy. It can be an immense help to you.
Be healthy. Eat right, exercise, and be sure to get enough sleep. Take deep breaths and do stretches to improve your flexibility. It’ll boost your self-confidence and empower you to be the best version of yourself. You’ll find that you’re far stronger than you thought possible, if only you will treat yourself with the care you deserve.
Relax. Be willing to take a break from time to time and do something that you enjoy. Even if it’s for a minute on the elevator – savor the empty space you have in the day. Treat those little moments as if they’re mini-vacations where you can do whatever you want. Be intentional about taking care of yourself and be protective of your own time.
Making a Mental Health Care Plan
Life is full of stress and you must learn how to actively manage it rather than ignoring it. Learn how to identify problems and create solutions. As much as it depends on you, mitigate future stress by setting yourself up for success.
For example, if you notice you become stressed early in the morning because you sleep too late and then need to rush to work, change how you get up in the morning. Wake up earlier in the day so you can accomplish everything you must do before work. Re-work your mental schedule so that you get used to leaving 30 minutes early rather than 15 minutes early. This will account for any traffic/construction you may encounter on the way.
As difficult as it is, part of adulting is taking responsibility for yourself. You are responsible for your own actions and it’s up to you to manage your own stress. Others can assist you, of course, but you are the one who must be the guardian of your mental health. Is a commitment you made doing more harm to you than good? You are the only one who can re-evaluate that situation and come up with a new plan.
Here’s another example. Say you’ve committed to volunteer for an organization that packs food for needy families. That’s a noble goal, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But, if you are going to school, going to work, and have little time to eat and pay bills, you should reconsider. See what can be moved around or adjusted a bit. Your mental health is worth more than the stress of spreading yourself too thin. Perhaps later, when things are less hectic, you can volunteer again.
Not everyone has access to mental health care, but everyone is capable of time management and finding healthy ways to cope with stress. With a little mental health care planning, you can mitigate issues before they even happen.
Stress Management for Critical Incidents
When a critical incident takes place in your life, it can knock the wind out of you. It can be very tempting to try to go on as if the trauma never took place, but you must allow yourself time to heal. It’s going to hurt – you have lost something. Rely on those around you and if you don’t yet have a support system in place, get one. If your support system has been hurt by the same incident, be aware that they may be unable to be there for you as they normally would.
Communicate in any way that feels most comfortable to you. For some, it’s talking to family or friends, and for some, it’s speaking with a therapist. Others prefer to keep a journal and write their experiences down. If you hear about someone in your community that offers Critical Incident Stress Management services, take them up on the offer.
Again, do not self-medicate. It can be easy to neglect yourself in light of such a troubling situation, but you must get back into a routine of caring for yourself, eating regularly, etc. Don’t make any major changes during this time, because doing so will likely add to the stress you’re already feeling. If you feel you’re not healing, seek professional help. If you’ve gone over a month with prolonged reactions, seek a Critical Incident Stress Management professional. They can help you cope.
Free and Low-Cost Mental Health Care
One of the problems with mental health care today is finding access to affordable mental health care. There are several resources available to those seeking free and low-cost mental health care. Below I will list some things to think about before you select a mental health care plan, and provide some free and low-cost ideas for you.
Finding a Mental Health Care Plan
When you are considering a mental health care plan, take some time to think objectively about what you would like to see. Some people have religious beliefs and prefer to speak to someone who upholds those same beliefs. Others prefer to seek counseling from their religious leaders rather than seek professional therapy.
Be careful to ask only a trusted individual for help with these kinds of issues. Unfortunately, religious leaders and therapists sometimes take advantage of the trust instilled in them. If you ever feel uncomfortable, don’t go along with it and continue. Find help elsewhere.
Free Mental Health Care for Teenagers
SAMHSA (the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Service Administration) is a great place to start. There are other helpful resources out there, including:
- Open Counseling website
- Homeless shelters
- Free clinics
- Veterans’ groups/organizations
- Churches/other spiritual organizations
- Medical schools with psychiatry departments
- Community mental health centers/other mental health programs
- Colleges/universities with psychology/social work/counseling departments
- Non-profit/charity organizations that are supported by grants/donations
- Give an Hour (an organization that helps veterans/trauma survivors)
Low-Cost Mental Health Care for Teenagers
If none of the free options are available to you based on your locality, eligibility, or beliefs, there are a few low-cost options for you to try. Here are a few low-cost mental health care options that may be available to you:
- Open Path Psychotherapy Collective (Lifetime Membership for $59, allows you to see any in-network therapist for $30-$60)
- BetterHelp ($320 a month to see a therapist, financial aid is available to help with 10-40% of the cost for those who qualify)
- Check the mental health services available in your state.
- Your insurance may help pay for part of your insurance. Find out more.
You Are Not Alone in This
Living alone is tough. You’ve gone from being dependent on parents to taking care of yourself, and are likely overwhelmed by the responsibilities on your shoulders. Although you must take responsibility and initiative as a young adult or teenager, you are not alone. You are surrounded by a support system of family and friends who have been going through similar situations. You also have plentiful resources at your disposal if you would look for them. These resources include opportunities for free and low-cost mental health care.
The support doesn’t end there. I built this blog with teens and young adults in mind. My goal is to provide the same kind of support system I’d have liked when I was your age. I’ve written an entire book about How to Leave Your Parents’ Home and Live on Your Own. I also have resources on how to look for an apartment, how to find free internet access and inexpensive computers, and more. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions.
“You will have bad times, but they will always wake you up to the stuff you weren’t paying attention to.” – Robin Williams
